


Please Don't Go

by random_writer21



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Battle of wakanda aftermath, Hurt/Comfort, Natasha Romanov Feels, Natasha Romanov Needs a Hug, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-01
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 00:01:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15130640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/random_writer21/pseuds/random_writer21
Summary: Steve shakes apart at the seems.Natasha cries at its earnest.And they're both not okay in the slightest. But they have each other.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Late to the hurt/comfort party, but I had to write about Steve and Nat and how they both deal with what happned in IW. I've written this as friendship, but can totally be seen as a romantic relationship if you prefer so! Enjoy!

Four hours. Four full hours of Steve screaming Sam’s name throughout the entire battle field. Four hours of Natasha following him around because she can’t leave him like this. Since the moment Rhodey said he couldn’t find Sam. Steve’s head had snapped up so fast, she feared he gave himself a whiplash. He stood up on shaky legs and blurred out of her sight, running like mad, calling Sam. She let him. She couldn’t tell him no, don't look for him. Maybe it was because there was a tiny hope that Sam would be found.   


He wasn’t found though. And it was so hard to think that Sam just ended up in a pile of ash. Hard to think that strong, full of life and loved to laugh Sam was dead. And they didn’t even get to see him one last time. His ashes just mixed with whatever. Nothing was left. Not his wings, not even his little birds. And oh she would kiss his little Redwing, he just needed to come back and ask.

Steve's voice grew hoarse. His injuries were far from healed, because not even super soldiers heal that fast. Especially not ones who were deeply under nutritious and refused to stop for a moment. But Natasha couldn’t say anything.

The sun was setting when Steve stopped. He looked around once more, and collapsed on his knees. His pale complexion turned ashen. He turned himself just a bit and started violently retching, as if grieve could no longer be contained in his fragile body and was trying to escape.

Natasha stepped closer and rubbed his back. The heaving sounded for a few minutes, painful to hear and witness. It was the first time Steve showed any sign of a normal sickness instead of being down because of injuries.   


He stopped, wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his suit. He looked up at Natasha and her heart broke at once. His eyes were bloodshot, face blotchy and red. He looked lost. “He.. He can’t be gone.. Nat, please,” he whispered to her, his throat too sore to speak properly.   


“Oh Steve,” she said. That’s all it took for Steve to break down entirely. Natasha guided his head to her shoulder as his face crumbled. She wrapped one arm around his shoulders, as the other cradled his head gently.

She buried her head in his hair, feeling him shake apart at the seams. He wasn’t crying, but she wished he was. This was far more painful. Seeing him unable to control himself, yet unable to let his emotions out properly.   


He stopped breathing for a second as his strong arms wrapped around her, and Natasha’s heart broke once again because she realised he was afraid of her leaving too. She responded with a kiss to the top of his head. He breathed again.

They sat for a while, tragedy too big, too painful for words exchange. It was Steve who pulled back first, his stuttering breathes withdrawing, leaving her neck to the cold air. He looked up at her, and through his eyes Natasha could see his already tired, cracked soul shattering entirely, jagged edges tearing his insides to a bloody mess.

It felt like a punch in the gut, the air pulled forcibly out of her lungs. She brought him close again and rested her forehead on his, the touch far more intimate than anything she did in her life. Steve’s dull eyes fluttered close, hiding the bloodshed within him. Their breathes mingled softly.

“I’m still here. I promise I'm staying,” Natasha whispered. “I love you.”

Steve’s whole body shuddered. “Please don’t go,” he begged, voice as broken as the rest of him. She moved a little to kiss his forehead.

“I’m not leaving. Never.”


	2. Chapter 2

Steve walked in the silent building, searching for Natasha. She had drifted away from him when he went to see Princess Shuri (after he pulled himself together enough to do so) along with Thor and General Okoye. Shuri was barely hovering at the age of eighteen and lost too much already.

  
They tried to count the losses but the wound was still fresh and numbers were too big. It hurt to see the names of the gone, to know they couldn’t have done any thing to stop it.

  
They parted soon after, the princess offering rooms to them temporarily. She told him his team were there already. He thanked her and went out. Steve couldn't find Nat in their assigned rooms.

  
So here he was, searching, anxiety seeping to his bones the longer he couldn’t find her.

  
His sharp ears caught a whimper as he passed one the many doors. He froze in his track and listened carefully. It could be anyone. The person whined again. It took all Steve’s power to not break through the door.

  
He opened the door quietly, eyes wandering around. The room was empty, except for the tiny figure huddled in the furthest corner.

  
Natasha was sitting on the floor, knees pulled up to her chest and forearms pressing the sides of her head. Her fingers tangled themselves into her blonde strands, tugging painfully on them. As Steve went closer, he could see the tremors shaking her body.  
It was like the disaster just hit her full force. And Natasha, always composed and calculating couldn't keep that facade up. Not now.

  
So he knelt beside her. He freed her strands from the shaky fingers. Steve took her hands with utmost tenderness in his and kissed her knuckles. She didn't look up at him.

  
“What are you doing here?”

  
“I didn’t want you to be alone,”

  
It was the same conversation that took place after Peggy’ funeral what seemed like a life time ago. The roles were reversed. Steve gathered Nat in his arms, murmuring “Come here,” to her.

  
She inhaled, trying to control herself, but her exhale came as a heaving sob. Natasha curled in Steve's embrace and started crying at its earnest. She gasped and sobbed, powerless to stop it. His arms surrounded her with care, and he rocked their bodies back and forth, his gentle whispers filling her ears and mind.

  
“The kids are gone,” Natasha forced herself to say between chocked gasps. “Clint’s kids.. the three of them.”

  
Steve pulled her closer. She could feel him start to shake a little too. “Oh god..”

  
“Clint and Laura are lost. I don’t know what to do,” she continued to cry as she spoke.

  
Steve never saw her like this, in all the time he knew her. It sent a dull ache to his heart. He had to comfort her.

  
“Non of us knows what to do, Tasha. But we will figure it out. I promise.” The words tasted like poison in his throat. He knew better than making empty, impossible promises. But Steve couldn’t handle seeing his friend like this.

  
“Don’t tell me lies, Steve. I don’t need them,” she whispered in his chest.

  
Steve swallowed. “I know you don’t. But I can promise you this; I’m not gonna stop till I fix this. And if I can’t, I’ll try again.”

  
“Fixing the world isn't your responsibility.”

  
“But helping my friends is.”

  
Neither said a word after this. Steve went back into swaying them from side to side, his hand occasionally twirling Natasha's light locks.

  
It took a while, but Natasha finally let her herself surrender to sleep. Her breathes were a little shallow from her injured ribs. But she was here. She was with him.

  
Steve cradled her delicately as he stood up. His memory led him through the large building to their suit.

  
He entered the bedroom and placed his friend on the bed. She was still out like a light. He pulled the blankets on her small form and tucked her in.  
With the lights dimmed and room warm, Steve kissed her forehead, just like she did to him before.

  
“I love you. Sleep well.” He said. With one last glance at her, he left the room.


End file.
